Austrian "Babemelter" PT Shorts
Austrian "Babemelter" PT Shorts
Austrian "Babemelter" PT Shorts
Austrian "Babemelter" PT Shorts
Austrian "Babemelter" PT Shorts
Austrian "Babemelter" PT Shorts

Austrian "Babemelter" PT Shorts

Regular price$5.99 USD
/
Rated 4.9 out of 5
Based on 63 reviews

  • Low stock - 8 items left
  • Inventory on the way
Size
Condition

“You can't climb the ladder of success with your hands in your pockets.” — Arnold Schwarzenegger

That's why the Austrian military designed these shorts with Arnold Schwarzenegger in mind. One small back pocket with enough room to hold your tourniquet so you can be the world’s highest, speediest, lowest-draggest, operator. As a bonus, it sports an interior liner to hold all the goods securely while you blind them with your speed, style and thighs. 

Excellent for use at the beach, in the gym, in a shoot house, your moms house and the Whitehouse(?). The possibilities are endless. Grab these shorts, pre-workout and enough steroids to kill a small horse and get after it kings. 

Specifications

  • Inseam: 3in (We’re told this is average)
  • 50/50 Cotton/Poly
  • Drawstring
  • Brief Liner
  • Back pocket

Sizing

The Babemelters follow the standard Austrian base layer sizing system, which we've translated into US pant sizes. From our preliminary testing the shorts will fit as follows:

  • Size 1 fits 24" to 32" Waist
  • Size 2 fits 28" to 36" Waist
  • Size 3 fits 32" to 40" Waist
  • Size 4 fits 36" to 44" Waist
  • Size 5 fits 40" to 48" Waist

Condition

Excellent: Babemelters have only seen minor use, with no rips, tears, holes, or cuts. Drawstring and liner are functional.

Unissued: Babemelters are in like-new condition.

    average rating 4.9 out of 5
    Based on 63 reviews
    • 5 Stars
      58 Reviews
    • 4 Stars
      4 Reviews
    • 3 Stars
      1 Review
    • 2 Stars
      0 Reviews
    • 1 Star
      0 Reviews
    90% of reviewers would recommend this product to a friend
    63 Reviews
    Reviewed by Jason P.
    Verified Buyer
    I recommend this product
    Rated 5 out of 5
    Review posted

    Who wears short shorts? Highspeed Lowdrag killers wear shirt ahorts!!

    Comfy shorts!! Definitely worth snagging a pair!!

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    Reviewed by Matt K.
    Verified Buyer
    I recommend this product
    Rated 4 out of 5
    Review posted

    Babe status: Melted

    Honestly great shorts, 3.5" inseam isn't that short for most people, but as someone with a large seat (read: ass) and legs they do show more thigh for me than they probably would for you. I basically only wear these now running and exercising. Lining keeps everything snug too, unlike UDT shorts where you're very regularly showing people your John Hamm

    Downgrading one star because I think I one of the 3 Unissued I ordered was an Excellent condition, nothing wrong with it functionally but it looks like arrived with some abrasion wear already on the inside along the crotch line, consistent with a couple months of regular use from a Big Thigh Gigh™ like me.

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    Reviewed by Ryan S.
    Verified Buyer
    I recommend this product
    Rated 5 out of 5
    Review posted

    Short

    My wife is now a puddle. Please help.

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    Reviewed by Sam M.
    Verified Buyer
    I recommend this product
    Rated 5 out of 5
    Review posted

    Perfect

    Shorts fit perfectly and omit a strong aura around you while wearing them. Sorta like the Player in Morrowind while wearing magical armor.

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    Reviewed by Joseph I.
    Verified Buyer
    I recommend this product
    Rated 5 out of 5
    Review posted

    Babemelter- Accurate

    What can I say? They really are babemelters

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