Tired of flimsy, overpriced vests that look like they were designed by accountants (or YouTube LARPists)? It's time to embrace the rugged, no-nonsense engineering of the Czech military. Introducing the Vz. 95 Woodland Assault Vest, a masterpiece of Central European functionality that's ready to haul your gear, intimidate your neighbors, and make you look like you just stepped out of a forgotten action movie. Dressed in the iconic Vz. 95 "leaf" camo, this vest is less of a piece of gear and more of a statement.

Forget futzing around with bags, straps, and packs, just throw this on for plug-and-play tactical efficiency. Everything you need is already attached and exactly where it should be. It’s the perfect grab-and-go rig for the range, the field, or a very cool very chill period of civil unrest (hypothetically).

Pouch-a-Palooza: This thing is loaded with integrated pouches. You get two triple-stack magazine pouches (perfect for Vz. 58, standard AK mags, or STANAG mags), two large utility pouches for your essential gear (or even more mags), and two smaller grenade (or tiny itty-bitty baby magazines) pouches. Organization has never been so aggressive.

Iconic Vz. 95 Camo: The legendary Czech woodland pattern is perfect for disappearing into the forest or just lording it over Multicam enjoyers.

Built Like a Tank: Made from brutally tough canvas and nylon, this vest was designed to be dragged through the mud, snagged on barbed wire, and generally abused. It will probably still look better than you after a hard day's work.

Adjustable for Real Humans: With adjustable shoulder and side straps, you can cinch this bad boy down for a snug fit, whether you're built like a string bean or a bear.

Loops for Extra Goodies: Integrated MOLLE style loops allow you to attach all sorts of nonsense for even more carrying capacity. The possibilities are limited only by your available credit.

 

Specs

• Czech Republic Army Issue
• Vz. 95 Woodland Pattern
• Heavy duty canvas and nylon webbing construction
• Two triple-mag pouches compatible with Vz58, AK, or STANAG mags
• Four large utility pouches, & two grenade pouches
• Fully adjustable shoulder straps & waist straps
• MOLLE style webbing for doodad, thingamabob, and doohickey attachments

Condition

Excellent: Vest shows minor to no signs of wear. All hardware is intact and functional, and there are no rips, tears, stains, or holes.

Good: Vest shows visible signs of wear, but all hardware is intact and functional, and there are no rips, tears, stains, or holes.

Serviceable: Vest has seen atleast moderate use, but retains most of its functionality. All hardware is functional, and there may be stains but no rips, tears, or holes bigger than a pinprick.

Your current chest rig is crying. She knows it’s so over. Do the right thing. Let her go.