Sur-Thrive the Apocalypse with the Official DayZ Plush Human Steak
You spawned in a random corner of Chernarus, punched a zombie with your bare fists, and ate vintage beans from a rusty, blood-encrusted can. You’ve eyed that sizzling human steak, wondering if it’s worth the Kuru shakes. Time to welcome that twisted survival fantasy into your heart and home– prion disease optional. Welcome the DayZ Plush Human Steak, right here on KommandoStore through partnership with Bohemia Interactive.
A plush tribute to the brutal, unfiltered chaos of DayZ is here to replace dear old Mr. Snuggums in your sleeping bag.
You’re a hardened DayZ vet with ‘tistic levels of devotion, or at least you say you are on Discord. This plush human steak captures the edgelord player-killer essence in ways "lootbox" merch never could. KommandoStore teamed up with the twisted minds at Bohemia Interactive to make this happen, and we’re delivering it straight to your mom’s basement for a few mere neetbux. It’s the perfect meal to satiate you after 50 hours of sprinting from Berezino to the NWAF.
This sickeningly adorable plush human steak screams “I’ve eaten worse, and I’d do it again.” It’s not socially acceptable, but neither are you.
Specs
- 12” long x 6” wide x 3” thicc–and juicy.
- High-grade polyester plush with a cotton-poly fill.
- Pristine condition.
- Side effects may include odd bouts of laughter. Re-assure your friends that they must be hearing things or that it was the wind.
- Official DayZ Plush in partnership with Bohemia Interactive
Care and Handling:
First and foremost, we'd like to remind you that these plushies are for humans only. They're a very tempting chew toy, but they aren't designed for that anything like that. So, unless your dog is really good at gentle-mouth-fetch we recommend keeping these well out of reach.
We inspected every plush in our warehouse to check for quality, but occasionally mistakes happen. If you find that your plush arrives with a manufacturing error or damage from shipping, please contact us for a free replacement. Just shoot an email to help@kommandostore.com
